Going the expected extra mile
This will be a relatively short one - I'm way too tired from my recent attempt at self-prescribed mental health rehabilition in a 10,000 elevation town to write a long one. Yes I got some altitude sickness. No I didn't get the bends or anything like that (someone actually asked me this today).
I'm starting to get a sense that people expect the extra mile from me. Not sure why, but its been that way since I was a kid. When I got straight A's for my 8th grade, I got the , "nice, but why is it such a big deal - he's smart anwyays." When I gave my valedictorian speech at high school, I got the, "nice, but why is it such a big deal - he's smart anyways." When I got into medschool on a full tuition scholarship, got the second highest boards score in the nation and went on to get my first choice in residency, I got the, "nice, but why is it such a big deal - he's smart anyways."
And its not limited to scholastic/career achievements. When I'm there for a friend or a family member, I got the, "nice, but why is it such a big deal - he's a nice guy anyways."
Don't get me wrong - I'm very happy with what's transpired in my life. I've got a good career, I'm married to a beautiful woman, and I have a fun loving dog. And I've got wonderful friends.
But I think people tend to expect me to go and do more than others would. If I do happen to succeed in it - its not so surprising or special. But when somebody else goes the extra mile - WHOA NELLY - they're a hero/heroine or some sort of demigod. I think what bothers me more, though, is that the golden rule seems unbalanced. Do for others what they would do for you seems like a great idea, but in reality, its poorly executed at best. So while I do things because I think its just downright necessary - I rarely see it happen in return. And I mean that. Rarely. Except from my wife - because, well, she's special. I don't expect it to happen in return, but damn it would be nice if it did once in awhile. Again, it has, but not as often as I would figure.
Not really a rant, not really a complaint - just a little bit of a melancholy perspective on expectations. Maybe I need to hit these so called oxygen bars JFunk and TLish tell me about.
I'm starting to get a sense that people expect the extra mile from me. Not sure why, but its been that way since I was a kid. When I got straight A's for my 8th grade, I got the , "nice, but why is it such a big deal - he's smart anwyays." When I gave my valedictorian speech at high school, I got the, "nice, but why is it such a big deal - he's smart anyways." When I got into medschool on a full tuition scholarship, got the second highest boards score in the nation and went on to get my first choice in residency, I got the, "nice, but why is it such a big deal - he's smart anyways."
And its not limited to scholastic/career achievements. When I'm there for a friend or a family member, I got the, "nice, but why is it such a big deal - he's a nice guy anyways."
Don't get me wrong - I'm very happy with what's transpired in my life. I've got a good career, I'm married to a beautiful woman, and I have a fun loving dog. And I've got wonderful friends.
But I think people tend to expect me to go and do more than others would. If I do happen to succeed in it - its not so surprising or special. But when somebody else goes the extra mile - WHOA NELLY - they're a hero/heroine or some sort of demigod. I think what bothers me more, though, is that the golden rule seems unbalanced. Do for others what they would do for you seems like a great idea, but in reality, its poorly executed at best. So while I do things because I think its just downright necessary - I rarely see it happen in return. And I mean that. Rarely. Except from my wife - because, well, she's special. I don't expect it to happen in return, but damn it would be nice if it did once in awhile. Again, it has, but not as often as I would figure.
Not really a rant, not really a complaint - just a little bit of a melancholy perspective on expectations. Maybe I need to hit these so called oxygen bars JFunk and TLish tell me about.
posted by Richard at 6:52 PM
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